brownieeyed

seeing a black and white cow is always so damn awesome it’s like Hey i know that guy.from my kindergarten abcs

spoonie-isms:
16woodsequ:

sorry but there’s simply not a malewife on the level of joel hammond from santa clarita diet. his wife turned into an undead flesh eating monster and he was like sweetie of course i will find people for you to kill and eat. i love you so much. i’m going to go have a panic attack.

fartgallery:

just overhead the most fucked up conversation at walmart:
customer: do you guys have any grapes?
employee: no, they stopped making grapes *walks away*

justplaininertia:

galaxyspeaking:
Aftertaste (I have about 3040506 more fanarts to post bear with me)
@archivistea

natashowlet:

🕷

miguelo-hara:

MIGUEL O’HARA aka SPIDER-MAN 2099
Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023)

i used to have to see a mandatory therapist for school and for a good 6 weeks i had him convinced i had a toddler and that i was a teen mother, honestly the most alive ive ever felt. i did however get kicked out of the free therapy programm once i got made bc it was 'disrespectful' to fake having a baby

Anonymous

sketiana:

sketiana:
n. six weeks..
the fact that yhey kicked you out of therapy after all that instead of like. doubling it.

beepathan:

hey everyone its april fools. but dont worry i dont have anything planned. just going to sit here and…
I LIED !!!! GET PRANKED
POST BELOW ME GET FUCKING WET

tahthetrickster:

socialc1imb:

socialc1imb:
Have yall tumblr kids seen the obliterated Link Plush that’s taken over twitter or do i need to show yall?
My god i have to show yall this its so funny but also i feel horrible for laughing

catboybreeder:

palmer:
Gay people I summon thee
Oh boy, I sure do love being gay! I just hope no one summons m-

manywinged:

squidy-y2k:
manywinged:
manywinged:
one of my girlfriends only tells the truth. my other girlfriend only tells lies.
and yes, they both smoke weed
and which one told you that?

knowyournewmeme:

“animal cr*ckers in my soup”

— surely temple